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Investigation Reveals Smokey The Bear Tweet Denying the Existence of Bigfoot

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Bend, OR – The Sasquatch Sun has discovered a controversial tweet from Smokey the Bear posted over a decade ago.

Smokey, who has helped prevent millions of forest fires in the Pacific Northwest, has apologized after an offensive tweet from 2008 was unearthed where he denies the existence of Bigfoot and mocks the very real creature’s believers.

“Bigfoot is a fake creature that never existed — except in people’s crazy minds. Anyone who believes in bigfoot is an idiot!

#BigfootSucks #ChicagoBears”

— @Smokey50, Twitter, February 14, 2008

Smokey admitted the tweet was “hurtful and embarrassing.” He said he doesn’t want to take away all the good he’s done to protect America’s forests. He has since deleted the extremely offensive tweet that set his Twitter page on fire with outrage.

After learning about the tweet, Matt Moneymaker of the Bigfoot Research Organization said he has cut all ties with Smokey. “We cannot allow this type of mockery of our beliefs to continue. That is why, effective immediately, we are cutting all ties with Smokey,” said Moneymaker. He is also advising all Bigfoot researchers to avoid searching for Sasquatch in National Forests, and to focus instead on heavily populated urban areas.

When asked what he plans to do next, Smokey said, “I’m just going to lay low for awhile and safely smoke a cigarette in bed and not in the forest where Bigfoot definitely lives.”

Note: The Sasquatch Sun produces hard-hitting, in-depth news satire for the sunny Pacific Northwest. The preceding article is a mythical work of fiction and is not an actual news story. Leave and view comments below.
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