Republic, WA - An undercover sting investigation by The Sasquatch Sun has uncovered what Loren Culp’s new top secret slogan is going to be: “Vote for Culp and beat the Dems to a Pulp”. “Yeah, you big media guys found out our secret slogan,” said
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Yakima, WA - To show how much he cares, Gov. Jay Inslee traveled today to Yakima County to visit the firefighters on the front lines of the Evans Canyon fire. “I love these guys so much, I thought I would come visit them in person and bring them a b
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Salem, OR - Oregon Governor Kate Brown has been arrested for intentionally setting wildfires throughout the state. “Yes, it was me this whole time, you ignorant fools!” admitted Brown, laughing maniacally in a courtroom where she was being arraigned
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Pacific Northwest - Smokey the Bear has a message for rioters across the Pacific Northwest: “Only YOU can prevent forest fires! Whatever you throw, make sure it don’t glow!” The icon of forest fire management came forward with his urgent message
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Portland, OR - This year the list of most popular baby names in Portland has a decidedly Cold War feel to it. “Old-fashioned Communist names are making a big comeback this year, thanks to the large native Antifa community in the city,” said Shelly K
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