Medford, OR – Beginning Tuesday, the City of Medford has banned drive-by parades within the city limits. Mayor Gary Wheeler said in a press statement that the situation has gotten out of control. “We know people are cooped up due to the coronavirus. But drive-bys are not the answer any longer.”
Since the coronavirus outbreak, people have resorted to celebrating birthdays and other special occasions with drive-by parades so friends and family can participate while keeping a safe social distance.
“The other day we had over 3,000 cars drive by little Billy Hargroves’ house to celebrate his 5th birthday,” said Police Chief Scott Clausen. “I like birthdays and all, but when that many cars clog the streets for 18 hours, something has to be done. It took me 3 hours to get to Lark’s Kitchen & Cocktails for my lunch break. Rest assured, my lunch and cocktail were to go. I didn’t actually go inside the restaurant. I support Mayor Wheeler 100%.”
Billy was arrested and released on $5,000 bail with an ankle monitor until his arraignment in front of a judge next week.
Billy’s dad, Stephen Hargroves, was not too happy with this new order and his son’s arrest. “I feel lucky that Billy got to see all 3,000 of his friends before this draconian order was put in place. But next week is my niece’s 8th birthday and we wanted to do the same for her. We were expecting around 2,000 cars for that event. There are less cars because more people like my son than my niece, but that’s another story,” said Hargroves. “We will defy this order and resist this government’s overreach. If my niece goes to jail like Billy, well too bad for her!”
Mayor Wheeler said there was an exception to the new order. “A parade of one car will still be allowed as long as they applied for a permit one week before the parade. The permit will only cost $969,” said Wheeler. “This still shows we care for our citizens. It’s just another common sense law passed by our government leaders to protect us and our police officers’ right to get to lunch on time.”
