Seattle, WA - Microsoft Access programmer Benji Cartwright is a self-described introvert. "I identify as a Person-Of-Shyness. I try to be bold at parties and at work, but mostly I try to avoid people at all costs, including the restroom. I’m really
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Seattle, WA - The Seattle City Council voted last night to strike against all property and sales taxes during the coronavirus pandemic. “We have to do something during this crisis to help our citizens to escape these oppressive and evil taxes,” said
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Seattle, WA - On direct orders from President Trump, the US Geological Survey has planned an eruption of Mount Rainier next Tuesday. “We’re going to level that sucker,” said USGS Director Jim Reilly. “Mount Rainier will be no more after Tuesday, God
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Seattle, WA - City Council member Kshama Sawant was caught on camera Thursday stealing a stapler from Amazon headquarters. “We are investigating this matter very seriously, “ said Police Chief Kathleen M. O'Toole. In the video released this morni
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Seattle, WA - Seattle has passed a law that makes it illegal to cut in line anywhere in the city. “We’re going to stop people from not properly waiting in line,“ said Mayor Jenny Durkin. “It isn’t fair for the people waiting in line the correct and
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